


someone that i used to be, someone that i will be

by jordankennedy



Category: Blaseball (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Depersonalization, Gen, no beta we die like incinerated players, not entirely sure if it counts as major character death but it's there just in case, this one's just sad folks!, unreality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-19
Updated: 2021-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-28 10:47:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30138378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jordankennedy/pseuds/jordankennedy
Summary: wyatt "nines" mason's first, and last, game as a pitcher for the new york millennials
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	someone that i used to be, someone that i will be

**Author's Note:**

> remember how blaseball is a horror game? yeah me too. i don't know what other tags to add to this but i've been told it's unsettling so... yeah  
> title is taken from "i don't know" by ghost quartet

Was it possible to feel the absence of life without truly being dead? Wyatt Mason IX would say yes if he was able. (Or, as his teammates called him, Nines. He liked the nickname. It felt nice to have something to call his own). It wasn’t supposed to end up like this. It was supposed to be _fun._ But now there was nothing but the _echo echo echo echo echo echo echo_ of someone that used to be. No. Not even that. That’s what he was before. He was simply static. He felt nothing, but after everything else, it was a blessed relief.

_where did it all go wrong?_

Today was his debut as a pitcher, and _gods_ he was so excited. Nines watched his teammates bat from the dugout. **Hatfield Suzuki hit a ground out to Kelvin Drumsolo.** Not off to a good start, but that could hardly dampen his mood. If anything, it would just bring him closer to what he wanted to do.

“You excited, kiddo?” Nines nearly jumped at the sound of Andrew’s voice. Had he been that obvious? “You’ve got a right to be. You’re gonna do great things, I know it.”

Nines was ecstatic. “Really?”

Drew ruffled his hair. Nines quickly fixed it, which made them laugh. “Of course. We all believe in you. Now—”

**Ren Hunter hit a ground out to Evelton McBlase II.** “—I’ll get back to you on that. I’ve got some ball to play.”

In the end, Andrew hit a flyout to one of the Mechanics. Nines grabbed his glove and sprinted out to the pitcher’s mound. This was going to be _great._ And for the first time pitching, it was. His first inning was a shutout, which he was _extremely_ happy about. Everyone else was impressed too. Nines was practically glowing with pride by the time they were done with it. The second inning didn’t go as well as the first, but he still counted it as a success because they only got one run in. The top of the third went by quickly. 

Now it was his time to shine.

**Evelton McBlase II strikes out swinging.** One down, two to go. This would be another easy inning. **Mira Lemma batting for the Mechanics.** Nines readjusted his cap, a grin plastered on his face. Time for another strikeout. But then, there was a tug at the core of his being. Nines brushed it off and ignored the ringing in his ears that came along with it. It was probably nothing. It couldn’t have been anything. Maybe his nerves were catching up with him. That had to be it, right?

Wrong. The ringing grew louder and louder. Nines dropped the ball and his mitt. He clapped his hands over his ears, trying to drown out the _awful noise._ But it was in vain.

**ECHO Wyatt Mason IX STATIC**

**ECHO Wyatt Mason XI STATIC**

Nines cannot describe what happened. One minute he _was_ . The next, he _was not_. The noise was deafening now. Louder than anything he had experienced. Not that he had much time to experience anything at all. It was excruciating. He might’ve screamed. It didn’t matter. It’s not like he would’ve been able to hear it anyways. (Anyone at the Core Pillar Center could tell you that, yes, Wyatt Mason IX did scream. It wasn’t normal, though. His agonized cries sounded eerily similar to feedback from a microphone). He could not see his teammates and the opposing team staring at him in abject horror as his “who” was torn from his “what”. But then, something curious happened. Despite not being in the roster anymore, Nines was still there. No. That wasn’t right. What was left behind was _not_ Wyatt Mason IX. Not wholly. Simply a fragment of what once was. A shifting mass of static in the shape of a person, still wearing the Millennials’ uniform. This was something that was holding on despite the odds. The game needed to be completed. Nines could not leave the mound until then. How cruel that was in hindsight. That whatever force brought him here would not let him go until he completed his job.

It was painful, existing and not existing at the same time. Being stuck in two conflicting realities was worse than _anything_ imaginable. Even the initial process was better than this— _anything_ was better than this. He would not wish this on anyone. At least the other Wyatt was able to rest. He envied him greatly. The entity calling himself Nines struck Mira Lemma out. Jasper Ji-Eun hit a flyout to Peanut Holloway. The third inning was now an outing. Nines’ form flickered momentarily. He was himself again, but then there was only static.

He walked back to the dugout and sat down. Everyone was looking at him, but nobody spoke to him. Nines didn’t mind. Or at least, he thought he didn’t mind. He wasn’t too sure of much anymore

Andrew Solis sat beside him. Nines looked at him curiously.

“Uh, so…” Andrew shifted from side to side. “Are you going to be alright, kiddo? I got some news that, uh, you were removed from the roster entirely after…”

Nines tilted his head. Another flicker of what he used to be. “I don’t know.” His voice sounded like he was speaking through an old TV. “I’m not supposed to be here.”

**Schneider Bendie hit a ground out to Bottles Suljak.** Andrew fixed Nines with a look. “What do you mean?”

“I’ll go away after this game.” A chorus of cheers rang out. **Peanut Holloway hit a solo home run.** “I don’t want to. But I have to. It’s been a fun few days.”

“Are you sure you have to?”

Nines nodded. “I’m just a small part of who you used to know. An echo of an echo. I’m not sure if I’ll even remember this game once I leave.”

**Mags Bananana strikes out looking.**

“It was nice while it lasted, Drew.”

Andrew wrapped their arm around Nines’ shoulders. It was… comforting. Nines relaxed into the hold. He would miss this. His team had always been so welcoming. He and Andrew had gotten along almost immediately. The part of Nines that was still surviving in him didn’t want to leave, but it was necessary.

“Will you come back?” Drew asked, quieter than before.

“I don’t know.”

**Hatfield Suzuki strikes out looking.**

“I hope so,” Nines added quickly.

“I hope so too, kiddo. Now go knock ‘em outta the park. I believe in you.” Andrew gave him one pat on the back before jogging onto the field. Nines knew what he had to do. For his team. For himself. He would play to the best of his abilities. Nines would not let his team down.

The rest of the game passed by in a blur. To his dismay, as the innings went on, his pitches became more sloppy. He couldn’t think straight. At the end of the bottom of the eighth, he had to be carried back to the dugout by his team. Nines knew why this was happening, but it still was _so annoying._ He couldn’t afford to let this game go sour. But his remaining time here was drawing to a close. He didn’t have the energy in him to make any goodbyes. All he could do was watch the game and wait for the inevitable.

_bottom of the ninth_

Someone hit double off of a fairly easy throw. Nines shook his head. Another pitch, another hit. Ground out. The next batter drew a walk. Someone else scored on a technicality or _something._ He doesn’t know, nor does he really care. He needed to end this while they were still ahead. Another batter. Two strikes came fairly easy, but they eventually hit a ground out to Ren Hunter. And that was that. The game was over. The Millennials had won, and now he could rest.

Nines closed his eyes, and the static faded from the field.

**Author's Note:**

> kudos/comments appreciated! find me on tumblr @mag128


End file.
